KFC’s new Double Down sandwich features two fried chicken patties instead of bread. They aren’t a bun; they’re death panels. – Janice Hough, Palo Alto, Calif.

Hank Williams just won a Pulitzer. Wow. Dead 57 years and still copping awards. Maybe Shakespeare should get a Tony. King of the Revivals. – Will Durst, San Francisco

Michelle Obama made a surprise visit to Haiti. Because if they need anything down there, it’s surprises. – Brian Lisi, New York

A Wyoming trucker set a Guinness record for most body piercings in a single sitting with 1,200 piercings in four hours. He broke the old record held by General Custer. – Bill Littlejohn, South Lake Tahoe, Calif.