Good New Yorker Cartoons: Lincoln

Family: The Gift that Keeps on Giving

Good Late Night Jokes: Chris Christie's Pants

Chris Christie - Caricature (Photo credit: DonkeyHotey)

Late Show With David Letterman

• The Rockefeller Center's Christmas tree is being put in place this afternoon. They bring it in and hoist it with a crane and steel cables. It's the same way they get Chris Christie into his pants.
• According to a study, there are three areas where humans now are getting dumber. High school kids. Retirees. And another group of dumb people? Four-star generals.

Conan

• There's a petition for Texas to secede. It has 25,000 signatures. The signatures are from every state but Texas.

Jay Leno

• It was announced today that former General Petraeus has agreed to testify before Congress. I guess he figured, "Why not?" Those questions can't be any tougher than the ones he's getting at home right now.
• A dozen New York Jets players told a reporter that Tim Tebow is "terrible." They said he's a terrible quarterback. And believe me, if anybody knows terrible, it's the Jets.

Maureen Dowd: Moochers Strike Back

Romney and Tea Party loonies dismissed half the country as chattel and moochers who did not belong in their “traditional” America. But the more they insulted the president with birther cracks, the more they tried to force chastity belts on women, and the more they made Hispanics, blacks and gays feel like the help, the more these groups burned to prove that, knitted together, they could give the dead-enders of white male domination the boot.

Borowitz Report: Math and Science, Too?

RPW Chairman Reince Priebus (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Opting for a bold “big tent” strategy to rebuild the party, Reince Priebus, the chairman of the Republican National Committee, told reporters today, “We need to welcome people who believe in different things than we do, like math and science.”

After disappointing results in Tuesday’s election, Mr. Priebus said that it was time for Republicans to become “more tolerant of those with a math-and-science lifestyle.”

“Just because we don’t believe in those things doesn’t mean we can’t get along with people who do,” he said. “We want to send this message: math and science Americans are Americans, too.”

Read more http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2012/11/republicans-consider-welcoming-people-who-believe-in-math-and-science.html#ixzz2BeMyJJWf

Good New Yorker Cartoons: After an Election