COLUMN: I Don't Get It

By Tobin Barnes
So I’m watching CBS news the other night, and the lead-off topic is the war in Iraq—yeah, kinda like every other night. And kinda like when I was a kid and Vietnam led off most broadcasts.

Except back during Vietnam, they’d have a little tote board on the TV screen, like they were keeping score. Nice and convenient, I suppose, but repulsive at the same time.
Maybe it was to let us know we should feel somewhat less miserable than the other side.

But on this recent night I’m talking about, things were special because it was the four-year anniversary of the Iraq invasion. Now with anniversaries, you either love ’em or hate ’em. Know what I mean?

This one comes in the latter category, whatever your political persuasion. Everybody’s at least a little disappointed with the duration of this conflict, don’t you think? Ask George Bush to fess up, he’d tell you.

Nevertheless, the anchor reported an opinion poll that said 29% of Americans think the war in Iraq is going well. And I’m sitting there thinking, “What in the heck are they smoking?”

Not that I’m looking to denigrate others’ opinions, but that’s my opinion. What alternate universe are they living on?

Going well as opposed to what?

Maybe things’ll be going well next week, next month, or next year, but you’re telling me they’re going well now?

Usually, my schtick isn’t the political scene. It’s more along the lines of irony. But, heck, 29% thinking things are going well in Iraq is disturbingly ironic.

They must be privy to some enlightening information I haven’t seen. Must be classified. Evidently they’re not giving it out to the non-Fox News public because they’re afraid the country will implode in terminal glee.

Either that, or maybe the 29% has some eternal optimism gene the rest of us missed out on. Find themselves walking around humming, “The sun will come out tomorrow...” while the rest of us are just a bunch of grinches.

So, as you can see, I don’t get it. It’s mostly the same information, but evidently two ways of looking at it. Someone’s missing the boat big time.

Maybe the two sides are utilizing different filters. Bush supporters filter out the bad stuff, thinking most of the news is pretty darned good...considering we’re operating in a 3rd world country with a 13th century mindset.

Meanwhile, Bush detractors filter out the good stuff, thinking most of the news is pretty darned awful...considering it was “Mission Accomplished” not long after the beginning of the whole convoluted mess.

Weird. Are our opinions shaping the politics or are the politics shaping our opinions?

A little later in the broadcast some talking head’s saying that if things work out well—like, you know, best case scenario?—we’ll be able to reduce troop numbers some time next year to the 40-60,000 level. And heck, that sounds nice—well, at least better—even though we’ve heard this before.

Except there’s a catch. The head keeps talking. Says we’ll have to maintain that level of commitment for maybe a generation or two. And “I almost swallowed my gum,” as my mother likes to say.

Maintain 40-60,000 troops in a virtually alien culture for another 20-40 years? For what reason? To stop them from using weapons of mass destruction, bring democracy to the middle east, fight them over there so we don’t have to fight them over here, keep a civil war from breaking out?

And lately they’re saying it will only get a lot worse if we leave. Gees, the rationale changes every time you change your oil. You need a scorecard.

It’s like we’re Br’er Rabbit stuck to Tar Baby. Like forever.

So, as I said, I don’t get it.

I guess I’m one of the 71%.

We don’t think things are going well. Have they ever?