Darwin Awards

Image via Wikipedia

ANGRY WHEELCHAIR MAN: DARWIN AWARD OF THE CENTURY!
Confirmed // South Korea: This angry man epitomizes the downfall of the human race. It began with simply missing an elevator, the proverbial straw on the camel's back. With stresssed-out rage, Angry Wheelchair Man rammed his chair 3x against the lift doors, (bam! bam! bam!), angrily breaking through and falling down the rabbit hole of the elevator shaft to his death. This dead 40-year-old lives on as a poster child: Stress kills. Gravity kills, too. 

2011 DARWIN AWARD WINNER, PLANKING SPANKING
Confirmed //: PLANKING? What is it? 'Planking' is the peculiar wit of lying flat as a plank in unusual locations--train tracks, fire hydrants, clotheslines--and posting public photographs, spreading joy. This Australian craze had infected poor Mr. Acton B., a (former) planking enthusiast who was not aware that Balconies Are The #1 One Cause of Gravity-Fed Darwin Awards. Not knowing, he was doomed to repeat the lesson. He stretched his body out face-down on the railing, arms by his sides, stiff as a plank, balanced. The species is doomed. Down he fell. Descent of man.