Jay Leno
- I think even President Obama realizes the Obamacare thing is not looking good in front of the Supreme Court. He's starting to downplay it. Like today he called it Bidencare.
- The Pope met with Fidel Castro yesterday. As you know, the Pope is the world's most recognized religious figure, not counting Tim Tebow.
Conan
- Yesterday, Mitt Romney told what he thought was a humorous story about how his father closed down a Michigan factory. Then Romney went on to quote some of his favorite funny quotes from the movie "Schindler's List."
David Letterman
- Seems Mitt Romney is going to get the nomination. That brings to mind the question of why we still have the other candidates. Rick Santorum wants to keep raising awareness for conservative issues. Newt Gingrich wants to stay in the public eye and sell more books. And Ron Paul doesn't want to return to his old life of panning for gold.
- Newt Gingrich is down to 12 staffers. The guy has more chins than that.
Jimmy Fallon
- A new poll found that President Obama’s approval rating is above 50 percent for the first time since last May. Obama made sure to thank the people who made that possible — Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, and Ron Paul.
- This week in Ireland an elephant escaped from a circus and ended up at a mall. Fortunately, the elephant didn’t hurt anyone — but he did sit in one of those Brookstone massage chairs with no intention of buying it.
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